A champagne socialist reflects on Western culture and the Universe... and whilst gazing at his navel, he comes up with a lot of useless lint. It is the fruits of this navel-gazing that form the substance of this blog.
Rove and Gretel's LoveFest
Published on July 29, 2004 By Champas Socialist In Entertainment
I’m tackling the big issues in this one. If you don’t like harsh sarcastic comments about reality TV, probably best you don’t read this one. I was kinda tired and irritable when I wrote this. This issue’s a few weeks old, but it was brought up again on telly on Rove Live. (To fill in any Americans, Gretel Killeen is the host of Big Brother, Rove McManus is our Dave Letterman, and Merlin Luck was a BB housemate).

How irritating it was to watch Rove McManus and Gretel Killeen comforting each other over their poor predicaments as TV hosts on Rove Live the other night. You see, the poor little darlings have both had interviewees in the past few months who weren’t easy to interview. Oh the poor little diddums. Boy, the trials and tribulations of being a well-paid TV host of a top rating show.

I once had a lot of respect for both these entertainers. They both came to prominence through regular appearances on Good News Week, where, shock horror they were encouraged to have opinions and to make jokes about politics and things that matter. Yet both have sold out to producing mostly what I consider to be inane twaddle. The increasingly Lettermanesque Rove has the occasional moment of silliness or self-deprecation, and Gretel makes some cutting remarks on the uncut BB, but mostly they are wasting their talents and years of their limited time in the entertainment business.

For those of you who don’t know, Gretel, host of the Australian Big Brother, was faced with the tormentuous position of having to interview a man with principles, called Merlin Luck (Rove had to interview Avril Lavigne, who doesn’t have principles, a brain or a singing voice). On Merlin’s eviction episode, instead of talking about the pressing current events of the day (such as why he didn’t shower in the nude, who did he get along the best with in the House, and whether he missed the outside world) Merlin placed a piece of masking tape across his mouth, with the simple slogan “Free th (sic) Refugees”.

For the first time, I had an ounce of respect for reality TV. Finally a housemate was using their moment of fame for a worthwhile cause. Finally they had found a housemate with integrity and passion. But most importantly, Merlin had the strength of his convictions, whether one agrees with those convictions or not (which I happen to). Despite the crowd’s boos, and coaxing from Gretel for him to speak, Merlin simply sat there displaying the slogan, determined not to let inane twaddle overshadow his statement. When people were to talk at the watercooler about Merlin’s eviction, Merlin wanted this to be what they talked about.

Gretel has kept on insisting that Merlin had made his point and should have removed the tape to talk about the important stuff that he was there for. Had he done that, my respect for him would have dissipated like fairy floss in the mouth. Around the watercooler, we’d have said: “Boy he really cares about the refugees, so much so that he removed the tape to do the interview about his experiences in the House. What incredible strength of conviction to spend 5 seconds making a point and to then get on with the real issues.”.

By sticking to his guns, Merlin was making the point that this is what matters. This isn’t a passing issue. As he said, he’s an ordinary middle class bloke and he was making a statement to our politicians that this is what people like him care about. Merlin will not say at the ballot box, “well jeez, I care about the reffos, but at least the Government’s got the economy right, so I guess I’ll vote for them”. That’s an important statement. In fact it was far more important than simply stating that his opinion is that the refugees should be freed. (I mean it’s not like he was making any argumentation for freeing the refugees). The point Merlin had to make was how important this issue is. So important that it has pervaded even the utopia of BB. So important that it will decide Merlin’s vote.

Gretel has insisted that Merlin’s silent protest was an aggressive act. She copped so much flak for that statement that I was shocked she repeated it on Rove Live, but seeing as she did, here’s the dictionary definition of aggression:

the practice of making assaults or attacks.

Boy watch out there Merlin, you might take someone’s eye out by sitting still on a couch. Oh no I’ve been attacked by a silent, non-moving man sitting over there. Gretel, (who I’m sure reads my blog everyday) one of the many admirable things about Merlin’s protest was that it was the opposite of aggressive. Many have made this point before me, but it doesn’t yet seem to have got through to Gretel. He did not attack anyone. He didn’t even go in a noisy protest with people yelling catchphrases that verbally attacked anyone. He made a simple positive statement: Free the Refugees. And he did it silently. And he did it without threatening anyone. That’s about as passive as a protest can be. Far more passive than my blog.

What Gretel was really concerned about was that a real issue was coming into BB. She was worried about losing the people who didn’t agree with Merlin. When Merlin appeared on Sunday’s final eviction programme, he had something underneath his hat. Some sort of political statement. When he revealed it, the cameras “were smart enough” to focus elsewhere, as Rove put it. Now what was Gretel’s problem this time? Too aggressive to be talking about the House whilst also displaying a message? Or was it just not what the viewers wanted to see? Give em what they want Gretel: Escapist gossip. We can’t have any of that politics stuff on this show.

About the only thing I think Gretel may have a point about is her claim that children in the audience were so distressed by Merlin’s inactions they were crying. But I’m sceptical (Surprise surprise). Firstly I know from my own experience in children’s theatre that just because all the kids are bawling their eyes out in unison does not mean we’re doing a bad job up on stage (or at least that’s what I tell myself so I can keep on performing. But then I’ve never had to listen to me sing). Secondly, any parent whose morals stoop so low that they subject their children to Big Brother ought to have their children removed by Family Services. A little bit of politics will do the kids no harm at that point, they’ve already reached the point of no return once they’ve had their souls taken at the gate through which they entered.

Thirdly, here’s what Gretel could have done to defuse the situation to the satisfaction of all parties involved. She could have interviewed Merlin about the refugee situation. She’s a smart girl, she might make a good interviewer if she gets some decent content to work with. I think it could have been interesting to get a lay opinion on the issue.

The reason she didn’t, brings me to one of my biggest problems with Gretel’s handling of the situation. She knew that what Merlin was doing was great ratings. They exploited it well in their advertising because they knew it was great ratings. When before has Big Brother ever made it to the Letters to the Editor pages of our major broadsheets for several days? When before has The Australian newspaper seen fit to print a major editorial article about Big Brother’s content? This was brilliant promotion for the show (and the refugee issue). But Gretel knew that if she had have conducted a proper interview with Merlin about the issue, then viewers would have turned off. Some would have watched to see the debate. But in the event, many viewers only continued to watch Merlin’s protest for the suspense of seeing whether Merlin would remove the tape or not. So please Gretel don’t tell me about the horrible situation you were put in. You knew this was good for you. This is what live television is all about. You know full well that that’s why people tune in to watch live television programmes. Something unpredictable might happen. And unlike Rove I’m not going to fawn over what a wonderful job you did of dealing with it. But from a promotional point of view, good work all round. This worked out brilliantly for Big Brother.

As a less important note, some of the aforementioned letters to the editors made some strange comments. Some people pointed out that Merlin had contractual obligations to do interviews. Well firstly, I don’t think BB have too much reason to complain about the material they got as I’ve already said (and also interestingly Catherine has ignored her duty to do an interview with MMM, but who cares?). But more importantly, it is a sad reflection on our nation when there are people in this country more concerned about some bloke fulfilling his contractual obligations to Big Brother than they are about the refugee issue.

Another letter writer said they had once had to line up for hours in the rain to attend a BB eviction show, so they could well understand the frustration of those in the crowd who booed Merlin. And I have a lot of sympathy for them. Imagine that. Hours. Queuing up. In the rain. How horrific. What next? Locking up refugees?

Comments
on Jul 29, 2004
As he said, he’s an ordinary middle class bloke and he was making a statement to our politicians that this is what people like him care about. Merlin will not say at the ballot box, “well jeez, I care about the reffos, but at least the Government’s got the economy right, so I guess I’ll vote for them”.


Merlin's not going to be saying anything at the ballot box - he can't vote - he was an illegal refugee (from his own mouth) in Australia for 8 years - He said on Big Brother - subject of another controversal show when he had this huge arguement with Paul that he isn't an Australian citizen and hasn't made any moves to become one.
Then on another episode of Big Brother -- after he came out of the house he Apologised to Gretal, BB, Australia - especially the audience and the kids in the audience and said he's started thinking about making moves to become an Australian citizen.
on Aug 05, 2004
Fantastic final line. I loved it.

For all your criticism of Gretel, spare a thought for her back and all the contractual guns a whole studio of producers are probably pressing into it. Television is so very rarely just about one person and I'm sure there are many people to blame for what has happened as a result of Merlin's bold and admirable gesture.
on Nov 16, 2004
A few points beg to be made on this subject:

While I actually support a better solution for refugees, I think he would have been well served to take off the tape as the bouncers came out. That way he would have been able to get more airtime for the plight he supported.

Now to the part that makes me angry. He signed a contract. To freely sign a contract blithely, is to show you have no honour.

It pains me that someone who cares so little for his word should stand up for so worthy a cause as freeing refugees. It left far too many booing him, when he could have had the best of both worlds and gained more support for the cause to boot!