A champagne socialist reflects on Western culture and the Universe... and whilst gazing at his navel, he comes up with a lot of useless lint. It is the fruits of this navel-gazing that form the substance of this blog.
Duh!
Published on August 15, 2004 By Champas Socialist In Politics
This morning, the Australian reported that a senior person in the Defence Department has confessed that John Howard knew that the children overboard photos were a scam before the election was held. This morning Laurie Oakes was talking with Mr Howard...

Oakes: Mr Howard what do you know about the allegations by a senior member of DFAT that you lied about children overboard?
Howard: Well we are certain that he's a poo poo head
LO: I'm sorry?
JH: Yep. He's a schizophrenic too and he suffers delusions. I wonder which of his personalities talked to the Australian.
LO: Isn't that multiple personality disorder, not schizophrenia..
JH: Oh, don't give me that politically correct rubbish. The man's loony, out of his tree, two children overboard short of a boatload and that's all that matters.
LO: So you've worked out who the anonymous source is?
JH: Well it's hard to work out because every time we're close to catching him, he changes personalities. Or maybe ASIO have found him and they just haven't told me yet. They don't tell me much those guys.
LO: So you haven't found him yet?
JH: No, but we know he smokes cigarettes and he stole Mulder's sister for the aliens
LO: Mulder's sister? Isn't that the X Files?
JH: Don't give me that unAustralian politically correct rubbish Laurie
LO: But Mr How..
JH: He cheats on his wife too!
LO: Who?
JH: The Defence guy. He has an alcohol problem and he's on antidepressants.
LO: I thought you didn't know who he was?
JH: Look, are you with us or against us?
LO: I'm sorry?
JH: So you should be you unAustralian coward. Why aren't you in Iraq? Bloody ABC journos and their left wing bias
LO: Mr Howard, I'm with Channel Nine, we love the Liberal Party.
JH: You're all the same. You just like picking on me.
LO: Mr Howard, if we could just stick to the issue..
JH: The premise that children overboard was based on a lie is a lie in itself
LO: On what basis do you say that?
JH: The premise that children overboard was based on a lie is a lie in itself
LO: Mr Howard, do you think there's anyone left who actually believes you on that?
JH: Yes, Andrew Bolt does.
LO: Andrew Bolt?
JH: Yeah, he's great. Look! (Puts hand puppet on his hand and moves the mouth)
JH as AB: Mr Howard never lies. He's great. I love his combover.
JH: You can tell him anything. watch this (whispers in puppet's ear) ssssssss
JH as AB: Mr Howard loves Asian people. And he only abolished ATSIC because he cares about the niggers.
LO: Err, Mr Bolt, is that word appropriate?
JH as AB: Oh now don't give me that politcally correct rubbish.

Comments
on Aug 15, 2004
hey you're online! how's it going?
on Aug 15, 2004
nice one champas, making me laugh out loud in a uni computer lab! i should throw you overboard for that kind of inconsiderate...ness...
on Aug 15, 2004
Excellent work my friend.
on Aug 25, 2004
Very funny but my issue with whole situation is that peopel are caring so much. A politician was found to be lying (possibly), what's new? I reckon we'd have alomst forgotten abou tit if Latham wasn't in hospital and that was all the media had to chew on.

What they could have been chewing on was the fact that Latham chose to go public instead if private, taking up a spot a less fortunate tax paying Australian could have had. Any person as rich as Latham who has health insurance would've gone private, but that wouldn't have been the left way would it?
on Aug 26, 2004
So sorry we couldn't only focus on the issues that suit you FishHead. Talk about being able to twist any political issue to suit your argument. That point about Latham going public, that was an excellent piece of twisting things about. If I had half a brain I might just find it convincing.
As to caring, I think we should bloody well care. I mean heaven forbid we give a toss about our Governments being honest. The reason there is such a huge fuss is because although Governments always lie, Howard has far outstripped any previous Australian PM... and he's proud of it.
on Aug 30, 2004
Lol, re twisting the issue, it's still a valid point. And the polls are showing that people aren't caring anyway. Politicians lie. Even Latham (recent example, Q: "when does a levy become a tax?" A by Latham: "Uh, I dunno").

As for a bit more indepth look at the overboard saga if you recall just before the last election Howard released the available footage to the public so they could make up their own mind. If he was confident he was lying he would've hidden it away so no one saw it. then you've got the fact the people now making these allegations have waited until this election to tell their "truth" which is different to the "truth" they gave to the original inquiry. Seems like the timing is a little fortuitous for Labour don't you think?
on Aug 30, 2004
Your thoughts on phone records disproving Mike Scrafton’s version of events? How the heck did he say all he said he said in less then a minute? And does him saying he may have got the sequence of calls wrong mean he got the number of calls wrong? He has maintained and been very forceful on the fact he rang him three times. But that would be facts and facts don’t sit well with the left wing do they?
on Sep 16, 2004
Well who's saying one side of politics is wrong because I say so now?
As one letter to the editor pointed out it only takes a matter of seconds to say "It appears that the photographs of children being thrown overboard were fabricated Mr Prime Minister.".
I've said before I'm not really interested in Scrafton's account. I didn't believe Howard in the first place, and nor do I think this is the main issue in the children overboard affair.